A Proactive Approach to a Mistake -- An excerpt

Reactive Language	Proactive Language
There's nothing I can do.	Let’s look at our alternatives
That's just the way I am.	I can choose a different approach
S/He makes me so mad.	I control my own feelings
They won't allow that.	I can create an effective presentation
I have to do that.	I will choose an appropriate response
I can’t	I choose
I must	I prefer
If Only	I will

The proactive approach to a mistake is to acknowledge it instantly, correct and learn from it.
But not to acknowledge a mistake, not to correct it and learn from it, is a mistake of a different order. It usually puts a person on a self-deceiving, self-justifying path, often involving rationalization (rational lies) to self and to others. This second mistake, this cover-up, empowers the first, giving it disproportionate importance, and causes far deeper injury to self.
It is not what others do or even our own mistakes that hurt us the most; it is our response to those things. Chasing after the poisonous snake that bites us will only drive the poison through our entire system. It is far better to take measures immediately to get the poison out.
Our response to any mistake affects the quality of the next moment. It is important to immediately admit and correct our mistakes so that they have no power over that next moment and we are empowered again.

--Stephen R. Covey--

An exclusive: On Faith, Trust, Betrayal

The following is a piece of an interesting exchange that
I had with someone years ago. I'm sharing it with you in all its
integrality.


Isn't it fascinating how we all have different facets to our
personalities? And isn't it sad too that even the same
person who maybe on our side most of the time, who loves
us mostly can also turn around and say the most vicious
thing without us ever knowing about it?

We are so many things--betrayer, lover, friend, saint,
sinner, etc--that noone can see all of our being in total,
but are only subjected to slices of our personality at any
given time. I see this on a daily basis. Married men that
I work with, for example, men I've broken bread with, men
i've sat across the table while they hug or kiss their
wives or girlfriends. These same men would, out of the
sight of their wives or children, would turn around and
look at other women and talk about doing things to them
in the most vulgar way.

It continues to be a pretty disgusting thing to observe,
causing me in most occasions to remind them of their
commitment. I never--ever--did that when I was married.
It was not only  a promise to my wife, but a personal
one between me and God.

And so we go on living under this illusion--faith really--
that the person whom we dined with, shared a movie,
discussed the most intimate of issues, the one who just
kissed us goodbye before heading to work, our lover,
friend, comrade--that this same person whom we trusted
above all others, can just as easily turn around and
betray that faith, that trust, within the blink of an eye.

And yet some of us continue to believe...we continue
to have faith in others. We must. Because without that
faith, the world would be an unbearable place to live in.

Hillary My Hero!!

She has set the bar very high!!
The woman is a genius
Ambitious and courageous
I am almost envious
Determined and undeterrable
She's uncomparable
Compressed and oppressed from every corner
Yet she stands tall and stronger
Praised for her feminist activism
Yet criticized for her energism
How does she do it
I can only imagine it
Looked down for not dumping Bill
In her pain decided to climb the Hill
It takes one of a kind
To look throughout the blind
Despite the clouds and the crowd
And find something to be proud
Hillary you're my hero
To you my chapeau and my bravo
You have set the bar very high!!

Whose fault is it anyway?

I remember when I was a child, in my uncle living room, there was this citation "every man was born good but society has made him wicked." Reading that, I would think it makes sense justifying it with examples such as: a man (or a woman) gets his/her accent from the environment they grow up, they like or dislike certain things depending on what they've been exposed to. However if society renders one wicked, at what point is it the person responsibility to deal with the consequences of their own choices? At what point would the person stop blaming their surrounding, their family heritage and courageously face their action and say: "Sh**!! I've done wrong, and I need to take corrective action to remedy the situation?" I have a 15 yr old son that I'll call J., he's a very bright child, yet lazy. His dad has told me countless of time that J has a hard time digesting failures. If J has a bad grade, then it's the teacher's fault for not explaining the subject adequately; If J doesn't perform well in sports, then it's the referee's fault for putting him on the bench. Well it's understandable that a 15 yr old would try to justify his misdeeds, but should the same understanding apply to educated, well rounded adults? Can an adult excuse his/her behavior by explaining it away with: "My dad was like that, therefore I must be like him" or "when I look at my brothers, none of them got successful with the diplomas that they got in school". The former was once given to me by s.o who was trying to explain his irrational misdemeanor and the latter by a s.o (titular of a high school diploma and some college) who was trying to justify the failures in their life despite the many good opportunities surrounding them. As for myself, I believe there are things that one can control and other beyond one's control. And my philosophy has always been, control the things you can and leave it up to God to take care of the rest. In other words, if s.o has tried unsuccessfully to eliminate you, then you should take proactive steps to protect yourself. If you're the perpetrator, then act like an adult, apply the IBM rule aka I Blame Myself, right the wrong instead of blaming it on your genealogy or some third party.

Presidential Election 2008!!

I could feel the blood racing through my veins!! These presidential elections are sucking me in, who could have believed it a year or more ago?!! I've told my fellow companions, I'm supporting Hillary Clinton. American want to see change, they have change in Hillary!! She's smart, intelligent, very eloquent and has "proof of payments". Yes, I'm betting on her experience, not only her experience at the white house but her experience as a woman. She has sustained the most public humiliation a woman can ever know, she chose to support her husband nevertheless, to keep her family united. She demonstrated forgiveness rather than revengefulness, togetherness rather than divisiveness. That's the type of leader that America should want. That's change we can believe in. I'm dismayed by the feminist attitude towards my girl Hill. When she wittily speaks and tactfully bring her point across, she labeled as being not likable or to put in the words of an iowan caucus-goer "she's like a robot" as reported by Calmes and Chozick from the Wall Street Journal Sat/Sun Jan 5-6 issue. I admire, though the polls are slightly in her disadvantage, I still believe she can pull it though, and regardless of the end results, I'll always admire and respect her for at least trying and daring to run for the most powerful position in the world: President of the United States of America!!

I Love You

Something happened yesterday, insignificant to the regular the American or Western culture citizen, but enough for me to notice. I was having a very pleasant phone conversation with a female friend of mine, and as we were closing it she said "I love you" and I replied back "I love you". You may be rolling your eyes now, but let me explain. Where I come from, a beautiful country called Cameroon, we don't say "I love you", parents don't teach their kids to say that, and they, the parents don't say it to their children. I mean literally say it, of course there are gestures that imply the "I love you" sentence such as a hug, a large smile, giving gifts but the phrase herself is rarely if not never pronounced. The contrast with the United States is definitely flagrant, saying "I love You" is the closing key note between family members. "I love you" has replaced "see you later" or "goodbye". Now, after a heptad spent here, I've observed some children in our little Cameroonian community, and they say "I love you" to their parents. And honestly, I believe it's a good thing. Nevertheless, I can't help myself but ask, what prohibit us from saying it to the people (aside the ones in our family) that are closed to us? Pride? I really can't find a good argument, may be it's the fear of what the other person may say or think about us. Perhaps, we're afraid that they may not say it back to us and we may take it as a sign of rejection, or perhaps we just don't want to get to close. Saying "I love you" is not just about those little three words, it does imply, "I'm available to you if you may need me", "I'll support you if you may need me", "I'll never betray you", "I trust you'll never hurt me". There are those implicit expectations we put out there, and just so not to risk our heart, we keep ourselves in our carapace.
On a Christian perspective, Jesus was a BIG fan of love, "Peter, do you love me?", "I'll give you a new commandment, love the Lord your God...", "People will recognize you belong to me by the love you have for one another..." and it goes on and on. Sometimes in church, the pastor will say "turn to your neighbor and tell them I love you or I'm happy to see you", I mean common, if one is honest with oneself, s/he will not trust that coming from a total stranger, especially the one while getting to his/her seat, stepped on your toes or bag or made you dropped your bible. When was the last you said I love you to s.o who is not related to you, and really meant it? Maybe it could be today if by stopping here, you leave me an "I love you" note, ;).

Testimony From Rio...6th part (French&English)

Hello Woman of glory
It's with great joy that once again I turned towards my computer to share the goodness of our God. You know this world is so sad to hope the Good and the True. Only God the Father of our Lord Jesus can decorate our lives and turned our wounds into beauties. He is the one watching over His word to fulfill. The most powerful strength in the world is not prayer, nor fasting but the Word of God. She is capable to transform the desert into an ocean and difficulties into opportunities. All curses against a person seated on the Word have the opposite effect...amen!!
Well, what did I want to share with you...? oh yeah...I came back from Rio this morning, weary and exhausted. I know you'll tell me to rest, I know and you're right...Nevertheless, How do I do it? Testimonies that I witness here are so wonderful and provocative.
Listen, because of this morning exhaustion, I've decided not to preach this evening but to just attend the service. While I was in the office, the pastor sent to call me to listen to testimonies after I'd been to his church. Three weeks ago, Sunday September 16th, I was preaching a message titled: "The power of sacrificial offering" ( the message is on DVD and you'll have a chance to get it once I'm back), at the end of the sermon, I called people to come and give sacrificially et many came by faith. This Sunday, as a result to this obedience to the Lord, eleven people presented their new cars to the Lord, another who came to see me after an additional offering to bless my ministry, got a free car of a value of over 25 millions of Francs (about US $55,000.00) with a promotion at his job. Promotions and testimonies flowed in the room til the extend I asked myself what was going on. All of this in three weeks??? There only the God of the bible to do that.
It was moving, blessing and revolting.
- Moving to see happy people obeying to God that day
- blessing to know that what God says is true: Whom who sow with tears will reap with joy.
- Revolting because I started thinking of my country again and asked myself: what is wrong?
Then, God talked to me and put upon my heart a 21 days crusade of resistance and prayer against the enemy, similar to what Daniel did to see all His promises fulfilled even the merest ones.
Details of this program will be given once I get back home, it'll be from Dec 1st - Dec 21st 2007. Get ready because it'll be everything but entertaining: It'll be WAR!!! Aren't you tired to fight without being crowned? to see without possessing? to cry at night without seeing dawn?
21 days of war, 21 days of spiritual combat, 21 days of victory, 21 days of testimonies.
I don't know about you but frankly, me, I need a visitation from the Lord of armies. It's Him I want to invoke, it's him I want to see during that time.
Embargo on my family ought to be removed, destroyed over my finances, and annihilated on my future. I was born for victory, I'll experience this victory. I was born to be like God, I'll be like God.
Brazil teaches me a lot. We only need to come back to the Gospel's simplicity. Cry to me on the day of distress, I'll deliver you and you'll glorify me.
In three weeks hundreds of people have already testified and long to empty themselves for the King of glory.
I felt myself humbled by the grandiosity of the God that I serve. He's simply unbeatable. One more reason to love him till the point to crazily fall in love with him.
Give, give and never stop. Don't penny pinch, don't handpick, give the best to your God. I'm challenging you today to sow into people who contribute to the advancement of the Kingdom. To invest sacrificially. Give to the point that people will call you fool. Where are God's investors? Take an oath before the end of this week. Decide to invest...do something insane, contact me and I'll pray for you under this anointing that's over me here in Brazil. Why don't you make up your mind to support me in this mission? Tell me the gift, the amount of what you would have decided to give and I'll release the prophetic word that you need to see the accomplishment before January 1st. I'm waiting for you. Do something crazy and decide to get to a different level of faith.
With Love.

(French Version)

Salut Femme de gloire

C´est avec beaucoup de joie que je me tourne encore vers mon ordinateur pour partager avec toi les bienfaits de notre Dieu. Tu sais ce monde est trop triste pour esperer le Bon et le Vrai. Seul Dieu le Pere de notre Seigneur Jesus est en mesure de decorer nos vies et de faire de nos blessures des point de beaute a faire envier les stars. Il est celui qui veuille sur sa parole pour l´accomplir. La force la plus puissante dans le monde n´est ni la priere ni le jeune, mais la Parole de Dieu. Elle est capable de transformer le desert en un ocean et les difficultes en opportunites. Toutes maledictions envoyees contre une personne assise dans la parole produit l´effet contraire....amen!!
Bon qu´est-ce que je voulais partager avec toi ...?? Oh oui... suis rentre a Rio ce matin etant epuise et a la limite de mes forces. Je sais que tu me diras toujours de me reposer je sais et tu as raison... cependant comment le faire?? Les temoignages que je vis ici sont si merveilleux et provaquant.
Ecoute, due a la fatigue de ce matin j ai decide de ne pas precher ce soir et de suivre simplemnt le culte. Pendant que j'etais au bureau le Pasteur envoie m´appeller pour suivre les temoignages de mon passage a son eglise. 3 semaines auparavant a savoir le dimanche 16 Septembre, je prechais le message intitule: La puissance de l´offrande sacrificielle. (Message qui est sur DVD et que tu auras l´occasion de suivre a mon retour), a la fin du message j´appellais les gens a venir donner sacrificiellemnt et plusieurs courrus pour ce pas de foi. Ce dimanche, comme resultat a cette obeissance du Seigneur, 11 personnes ont presente leurs nouvelles voitures au Seigneur, Une autre qui vint me voir apres avec une offrande aditionnelle pour benir mon ministere recut un vehicule gratuitement de plus de 25 millions de francs avec une promotion a son lieu de service. Les promotions et temoignages ont coule ds la salle au point ou personnellemnt je me demandais ce qui se passait. En 3 semaines, tout cela..??? Il´n ´y a que le Dieu de la Bible pour le faire.
C´etait emouvant, benissant et revoltant.
Emouvant de voir des gens heureux d´avoir obeis a Dieu ce jour la.
Benissant de savoir que ce que Dieu dit est vrai: Celui qui seme avec larmes recoltera avec joie
Revoltant enfin par ce que je me suis mis a penser a mon pays une fois de plus et me suis demande: Qu´est ce qui ne va pas?????
Alors Dieu m´a parle et a mis dans mon coeur une croisade de 21 jours de resistance et de priere contre l´ennemi comme ce que fit Daniel afin de voir l´accomplissement des moindres promesses qu´il a un jour donne.
Les details de ce programme seront donne a mon retour et ce sera du 1er au 21 decembre 2007. Prepare toi car ce sera tout sauf l´amusement: Ce sera la GUERRE!!!
N'es-tu pas fatigue de lutter sans etre couronne? de voir sans posseder?
de pleurer la nuit sans voir le matin se lever???
21 jours de guerre, 21 jours de combat spirituel 21 jours de victoire, 21 jours de temoignages.
Je ne sais pas en ce qui te concerne mais franchement moi j´ai besoin de la visitation de l´Eternel des armees. C´est lui que je veux invoquer´c´est lui que je veux voir pendant ce temps.
L´embargo sur ma famille doit etre ote, sur mes finances detruites, sur mon avenir aneantie. Je suis ne pour la victoire , j´experimenterai cette victoire. Je suis ne pour etre comme Dieu , je serai comme Dieu.
Le Bresil m´apprend beaucoup. Nous avons juste besoin de revenir a la simplicite de l´Evangile. Invoque moi au jour de la detresse, je te delivrerai et tu me glorifieras.
En 3 semaines une centaine de personne ont deja des temoignages au point qu'ils languissent de se vider pour le Roi de gloire.
Je me suis senti dimunue face a la grandeur de ce Dieu que je sers. Il est tout simplement imbattable. Raison de plus pour l´aimer au point de s´en amouracher follement.
Donne , donne et ne t´artrete jamais. Ne calcule pas, ne trie pas , donne a ton Dieu le meilleur. Je te defie aujourdhui a semer dans de ceux-la qui avancent pour le Royaume. A investir sacrificiellement. Donne au point ou tu sois taxe d´insense. sois insense pour Dieu et il le sera pour toi. L´oeuvre souffre tellement dans notre pays. Ou sont les financiers du Royaume?? Prends un engagement avant la fin de cette semaine.Decide d´investir ..fais une folie et contacte moi et je prierais pour toi sous cet onction qui est sur moi ici au Bresil. Pourquoi ne decides-tu pas de me soutenir dans cette oeuvre missionnaire?? Fais moi savoir le don, le montant ou ce que tu as decide de donner et je relacherai la parole prophetique dont tu as besoin pour voir l´accomplissement avant le 1er janvier. Je t´attends. Fais cette folie et decide d´aller a une autre etape de foi.
Avec amour