Spitzer 's style

The Spitzer "scandal" lasted a whole 24 hr as the NYTimes front page story a few days ago. When I heard about it, I told myself 'here we go again, another one'. Perfect wife: attractive, intelligent, a professional (Silda is a corporate lawyer) and a mother. Perfect Kids: going to school, not involve with drugs, behaving just like kids with latest video game (whoohoo...PS3!!!). Perfect Job: I mean being a governor, and not some governor of some state hard to locate on a map like Wisconsin or Idaho, Governor of New York!! Come on guys, have a grip!! Anyway, I'm not here to beat upon you. I'll like to focus on the women. More often, we'll hear about the man infidelity and I'm asking myself what about the women? It's not like those men cheat by themselves, most of the times it happens with other women and definitely with married women as well (I'm excluding the gay clan here). Now, I don't understand the deal with married women but from my own analysis, women will cheat for these reasons:
- they're not getting any from their husbands/boyfriends or
- they're rejected by their husbands/boyfriends or
- they're mistreated by their husbands/boyfriends or
- they're complete sluts or
- All of the above
I watched the latest episode of 'Jungle Lipstick' and in there Nikko (a big magazine chief editor) is being unfaithful to her husband, hides it from her friends at first, then tell them and reassure them it's over, then start the affair all over again and hides it again from her friends. Then her best friend who is a mom, discovers it and is completely appalled by it and makes a comment directed to Nikko "Thank God you're not a mom, otherwise what would the poor kids have to live with!"
Do kids pay for the consequences of their parents reckless behaviors? Absolutely! There's so much a parent can teach their kids, but comes a time where the kids plainly imitate the parents actions regardless of what they've been taught.
Now back to the Spitzer's style, “He believed he could do whatever he wanted and not get caught, He had the perfect wife, the perfect children, the perfect job. But there was still self-loathing.”

Unconditional Love? I don't think so

I was having a conversation with someone yesterday and they said that family gives us unconditional love (and we're talking here about the family we have not chosen: mom, dad, sister and brothers, etc...). So it made me think, does unconditional love really exist? In my opinion, it is as existing as the teeth in a chicken mouth. Even God does not love us unconditionally, he requires us to believe in his Son Jesus-Christ in other for us to get in heaven (only applicable to Christians of course). If he truly loved us unconditionally, he could just open the gates of heaven to whoever is seeking them. The same apply for other types of relationships: husband/wife, boyfriend/girlfriend, friendships.
For husbands and wives, they both take "vows", they both set up conditions in which their undying love may truly never die. "In sickness and in health" --> you can be sick but don't get so sick that it'll ruin my finances, or don't get an STD that is not coming from either of us. "For better or for worse" --> as long as the worse doesn't include an irreversible 'offense' such as cheating, or reporting my/your inappropriate behavior to authorities.
For friendship, there is this implicit rule according to which as long as you don't step into my territory, then we can be friends. Or a better one, as long as you don't have something better than I do, then we can be friends. Or as long as you don't steal what's mine, we can be friends.
I'm sure we all can find many instances of any type of relationships we have or had that came with some explicit or implicit conditions. Even a relationship with oneself is not unconditional. Otherwise, there wouldn't be any suicide, as suicide results from the fact that one can stand oneself. Unconditional love? I don't think so.

"2 Legit 2 Quit!!!"

CONGRATULATIONS on your victories HILL!! You're TOO LEGIT TO QUIT!! (<-- Click me)

My letter to the Delegates

Dear Delegates,
I'll like to take this opportunity to express the reasons why I support Hillary Clinton. Aside the fact she's a woman I can relate to, not only has she sustained the most public humiliation a woman can ever know, she chose to support her husband nevertheless, to keep her family united. She demonstrated forgiveness rather than revengefulness, togetherness rather than divisiveness. That's the type of leader that America should want. That's "Change we can believe in". I'm dismayed by the feminist attitude towards my girl Hill. When she wittily speaks and tactfully brings her point across, she's labeled as being not likable or to put in the words of an iowan caucus-goer "she's like a robot". Her track record is proof that she has demonstrated leadership and as a senator from NY, was put in a very difficult position when it was time to cast the vote for the war. Torn between the lives lost during 9/11 and the desire to bring to justice the people who had perpetrated such a hideous crime, I believe she's made the right choice of the moment. The 1993 Healthcare fiasco that the nation adamantly blames on her is merely an indication that back then America wasn't ready for Universal Healthcare. We were a prosperous nation, the job market was booming, Bill Gates was gaining name recognition by the hour world widely, a gallon of gasoline was around a buck if not less, in other words, life was beautiful and we, the American public, said "why fixing something that is not broken?" Today, the dynamics are different, there is too much at stake: threats of a deep recession, the mortgage crisis, rumors of another terrorist attack, this feeling of insecurity looms all over the nation (financial insecurity, job insecurity, etc...). Yes time for change has come and it is physically presenting itself in the person of Hillary Diane Rodham Clinton.

An email from Hillary

This thing has gotten the best out of me!! I dreamed of Obama last night!! In the dream he had won the general election and chosen Edwards as his vice, and it wasn't clear whether Hillary whether his Supreme court Justice or the other way around. Lol.Yeah, I know this dream comes from the fact that she lost WI last night and it put me really down, I went straight to bed!! My hope has not faded yet and March 4th is really determining!! As a matter of fact I got an email from her, she needs my help and I'll give it to her like I have in the past. Ok ok ok...it wasn't an email directly from her, it was from her campaign, nevertheless, I'll be there for her. She's truly my heroine!! Go Hill!!

-- A believer against all odds --

A Proactive Approach to a Mistake -- An excerpt

Reactive Language	Proactive Language
There's nothing I can do.	Let’s look at our alternatives
That's just the way I am.	I can choose a different approach
S/He makes me so mad.	I control my own feelings
They won't allow that.	I can create an effective presentation
I have to do that.	I will choose an appropriate response
I can’t	I choose
I must	I prefer
If Only	I will

The proactive approach to a mistake is to acknowledge it instantly, correct and learn from it.
But not to acknowledge a mistake, not to correct it and learn from it, is a mistake of a different order. It usually puts a person on a self-deceiving, self-justifying path, often involving rationalization (rational lies) to self and to others. This second mistake, this cover-up, empowers the first, giving it disproportionate importance, and causes far deeper injury to self.
It is not what others do or even our own mistakes that hurt us the most; it is our response to those things. Chasing after the poisonous snake that bites us will only drive the poison through our entire system. It is far better to take measures immediately to get the poison out.
Our response to any mistake affects the quality of the next moment. It is important to immediately admit and correct our mistakes so that they have no power over that next moment and we are empowered again.

--Stephen R. Covey--

An exclusive: On Faith, Trust, Betrayal

The following is a piece of an interesting exchange that
I had with someone years ago. I'm sharing it with you in all its
integrality.


Isn't it fascinating how we all have different facets to our
personalities? And isn't it sad too that even the same
person who maybe on our side most of the time, who loves
us mostly can also turn around and say the most vicious
thing without us ever knowing about it?

We are so many things--betrayer, lover, friend, saint,
sinner, etc--that noone can see all of our being in total,
but are only subjected to slices of our personality at any
given time. I see this on a daily basis. Married men that
I work with, for example, men I've broken bread with, men
i've sat across the table while they hug or kiss their
wives or girlfriends. These same men would, out of the
sight of their wives or children, would turn around and
look at other women and talk about doing things to them
in the most vulgar way.

It continues to be a pretty disgusting thing to observe,
causing me in most occasions to remind them of their
commitment. I never--ever--did that when I was married.
It was not only  a promise to my wife, but a personal
one between me and God.

And so we go on living under this illusion--faith really--
that the person whom we dined with, shared a movie,
discussed the most intimate of issues, the one who just
kissed us goodbye before heading to work, our lover,
friend, comrade--that this same person whom we trusted
above all others, can just as easily turn around and
betray that faith, that trust, within the blink of an eye.

And yet some of us continue to believe...we continue
to have faith in others. We must. Because without that
faith, the world would be an unbearable place to live in.