Advices of A Mother to Her Daughter

Life is zero and you need to learn how to simplify things that happen.
Why would you stop eating because of a man? On the contrary, you should be taking care of yourself even more.
Cook something that you really like, mix some tomatoes with meat and onions and it'll be ready in five min.
Remember if a man is for you, he won't go anywhere. He'll wait for you. You won't have to do anything, just be yourself and stay nice after all it's a woman characters that are more attractive.
Go out, people who stay inside nobody sees them.
If a guy talks to you, just reply with the utmost kindness without showing much interest.
As you know, here in Africa, it's the man who should go towards a woman not the other way around.
You know marriage is not an end in itself, you see all those couples you think there's grand happiness?
Besides, if there's no husband you can still have your child.
Be careful not to embrace that country culture.
Know that you're still young and have nothing to worry about.
Un de perdu dix de retrouves (advice from a father to his daughter)

Thank you mom, I love you!

From Jesus [De]Generation to Jesus Realization

We were a bunch of Jesus freak as would i have said someone i knew in my past life. So full of zeal, preaching the gospel, dancing, praying, singing, we loved and liked giving our love back to anybody who wanted some. We had committees to organize agapes, our favorite singers where Don Moen and Ron Kenoly among others. We believed God was bigger than us and could take off any obstacle on our path, we believe our faith would move mountain (it had in some cases). If someone insulted us because of our faith, we were happy because we knew were getting persecuted for Jesus. We were young, we were happy, we were innocent. We were smart too, getting our homeworks done, our chores and passing our exams. We were Jesus Generation.
Today, some of us have become doctors, engineers, bankers, programmers, researchers, even preachers. Some got married, got divorced, others got married but couldn't have babies pleaded with God to finally find "answers" from a marabout. Some thought their own husband were useless and found solace in someone's else husband. Others left church once they realized they didn't need God to make it. Some left church because the church did not approve of their fiancée, others stayed in church in spite of everything. Some have developed their own philosophy about God and others have chosen to ignore the bible and live on their own terms. We have become Jesus Degeneration.
Some of us got so beaten up, inside and out, up and down but are still there, we're there hoping for better days, we're there praising for what we have and that will never be taken away from us, we're there praying for wisdom not to repeat the same mistakes, we're there picking ourselves up, dusting ourselves off, we're there standing proud of who we are and we still have joy. We're aspiring to be Jesus REALIZATION!!

Happy Endings

I couldn't concentrate at work, having had little to no sleep the nights before and I needed something to cheer me up. I opened up the NYTimes and found this rather misleading title: "Happy Endings" and after a quick read, here was I, sinking even further down than I already was.
I started reviewing my life and I came to the conclusion that I have lived the best life I could have possibly lived given my circumstances and that I was ready to pass away. I mean I've known sadness at its deepest level, I've been through hell and back, I've known joy and great happiness. I've made my parents proud, very proud. I've taken care of my family, I've done charity work, I've preached the gospel, so somewhere somehow I must have impacted someone's life in a positive way. I've watched all kinds of movies: trashy, dramatic, thriller, comedy, suspense, horror, silent, I've even watched porn (lol, Lord forgive me if I have sinned against you.). I've fallen in love, then gotten up, fallen out of love. I've given shelter to people who didn't deserve it. I've accepted and been accepted, I've rejected and been rejected. I've tithed, still do. My life has taken some type of existence. There's nothing new under the sun
Yesterday someone expressed their undying love for me. While all I wanted to do was to express my undying impatience with a homework I couldn't seem to complete. At the end, life has no meaning so does my mom tell me. We must take life as simple as it comes. Easy said than done. Yes, life has no meaning in itself, but mine has taken some type of existence and now I'm ready, ready to go, ready to leave.

Am I guilty?

I think I was born with an older soul than my young body. I have a weakness for oldies: soul, funk, blues and some good modern jazz. I heard this song on the radio not long ago and it just frizzled my hair all over my body (in a good way) and as soon as I got my laptop I had to YouTube it (Thank God for YouTube!) and there it was! A very soul smothering song about an affair between him and Mrs Jones. Now my peeps know how I feel about affairs, infidelity and the like. But this song has something to it that gets me to a point that I really enjoy it and can even picture myself karaokeing it. So my question is, although I'm viral anti-cheating activist, but still savor this funky song along with the lyrics, does that make me guilty of infidelity?

Let's Make Love Before We Say Farewell

My dad and I have this thing that we pull when we visit each other, we steal one another's CDs. I often joke with him that he should bequeath his CDs to me. On my recent trip to the motherland, I got this fantastic collection of oldies French songs. And the other day as I was driving to work, I turned my player and this song came on, sending me way back in the days when I was between 10 and 12 years old. As the words was distilling in the air, I paid attention to their meaning and it cracked me up. Here's an example by Jeanne Manson, who surprisingly is American but has spent so many years in France that she had come to espouse the French way of "coloring" love, the title is (literally translated):

Let's make love before we say farewell

Let's make love before we say farewell
[before we say farewell]
Let's make love since it's over between us
[since it's over between us]
Let's make love as if it was the first time
One more time you and I since love is leaving
[x2]
I can forgive you for everything and pretend to forget
I would like to close my eyes and do everything you want
I can share you and even plead with you but don't leave
I'll make myself so small that you won't see me
I'll be so tender that tomorrow you'll love me
I'll be all love and all to you but don't leave
[chorus] x2

Are You [very] Happy?

The other day I discovered that I was very happy. Dr Watson, my leadership teacher made us take this online assessment with a requirement not to think too much about the answer, but to select exactly what was on our mind at that particular moment. And one of the question was, would consider yourself to be: a) very unhappy b) somewhat unhappy c) somewhat happy d) very happy.
This prompted me to check in an online dictionary the definition of happiness and according to dictionary.com happiness is the quality or state of being happy [please note that happy is defined as being delighted, pleased, or glad, as over a particular thing], and a second definition associates it to good fortune, pleasure, contentment or joy.
These attempts to define what qualifies someone as a happy person remain quite obscure in expressing exactly the embodiment of happiness. My own take on the subject would describe happiness as the homogeneous fusion, the chemical combustion between your mind, your spirit and soul that produces a scent of joy, laughter/smile and peace inside and outside your inner being. The key note in here is PEACE. Peace with God (for those who believe in him), peace with yourself and peace with the people surrounding you.
As I was asking myself why I do think I'm very happy, I started considering my life in a completely different angle. I tried to look beyond the obvious that are often cited as pinnacle of happiness: professional accomplishment(income), intellectual capacity (education/school), social ties (elite club or friends), filial relationship (family). I discovered that although i have no assets of my own, I have a roof over my head; although my car belongs to the bank, I have not had any worry about going and coming back from anywhere; although I'm not perfect, I'm surrounded by people that have truly accepted me for who I am and do not hesitate to tell me when I'm wrong; although I'm nearly perfect (yes you read it correctly, nearly perfect :) ) I recognized there's always room for improvement. I have reached a balance of understanding myself and accepting myself and the circumstances I could not change. For instance, it had taken me a long time, despite the excruciating evidences, to accept the fact that I now was a statistics among the millions failed, irreparable relationships . Today having crossed that bridge not only liberated me but empowered me into reinventing myself. I wake up in the morning with peace in my head and peace in my heart.
Happiness is about leading every battles thrown on our paths, celebrating all victories, mourning some losses and still staying true to ourselves, true to the values that we abide to.
So are you [very] happy?

Are you a Closeted Christian?

Are you a closeted Christian? Or have you become one? I remember back in the days about 10 to 15 years ago, a whole generation of us was boiling for the Lord. Preaching and proclaiming the name of the Lord, trying to be a model at home and in school til the extend one will be ashamed to say "I believe in God" if they hadn't passed their exams. We all belonged to a group called CLUC (Colleges Lycees et Universites pour Christ) -- Colleges, High schools and Universities for Christ. We would all volunteer either for singing, dancing or acting for the Glory of our God. We wouldn't hesitate to share the word with our fellow classmates. We were young, innocent and filled with an unqualifiable zeal. Over a decade later, some of us have changed or let their circumstances cloud and mask the beauty of who they are. We get married and divorced in or out of the yoke, we sleep around with other people's husbands, we consult charlatans to fight witchcraft, we call other people "unstable", we resort to doubtful means to get what we want, we put aside the notion of goodness and forgiveness to embrace revenge and Schadenfreude, we stop talking about God (oh my gosh what is s/he going to think of me!!) and start gossiping, we forge an acceptable image of ourselves that is pleasing to whomever doesn't question or dare rebuking us (oh, don't judge me!! You have no rights). We lie, we hide, we no longer speak the truth, how can we when have left that Truth evade us? We took our Christianity and put it in a closet. The amazing thing about all that is that, it's not too late to take it out, dust it off and wear it again. Yes there will be (there always is) people calling you all sorts of names: Jesus Freak, bible thumper...etc. But guess what, those same people wish they had an anchor to hold on to, some hope to cling on to. Natty, a friend of mine, was telling how much she loves job and God and doesn't hesitate to say so to her colleagues at work and of course some of them ridiculize her but yet they turn to her for prayer or advices when they need some.
It's difficult to live that pure life that the bible promotes, certainly impossible to put into practice some of the basics like forgiveness but God assures us that "He will make us walk on the path of righteousness for his name's sake", we just have to be willful. Are you a closeted [wo]man of God, it's time to come out of that closet and proclaim with me: "I'M A SEXY [WO]MAN OF GOD AND I KNOW IT!!"