Prepare Yourself for 2011

     2011 is around the corner and I've been working on my "resolution" list since last month. I really don't like the word "resolution", it just makes sound like one more thing that is NOT going to get done. I prefer "Project" or "Plans". It's a huge one in the sense that it'll impact all the pillars of my life: spiritually, emotionally and physically. And although I'll be revealing bit by bit some of my projects, the purpose of this post is establish some guidance that'll be necessary to actually check the complete box at the end of the year 2011.

• Conception: At this point in time, we should have already dreamed up of something to accomplish in year 2011. If not, it's not too late. Let's get to work! eg: is it losing weight? Oh no forget about it! I'm not in the weight losing business. Is it doing sport more regularly? Or reading a couple of books?
• Write down your goals along with a clear expectation of the end result. It will help as a motivational tool. There are some people who spend their time writing wonderful things about themselves to distract them from the horrors they cause around them. A way for them to remind themselves they're not so bad as a person. So write down those goals and especially the effects of the end result on you as a person. Will it rise your self-esteem? Will it bring more joy or satisfaction? Will it better someone else?
• This is the most critical step, 60% of your success is encapsulated in it: Preparation. Prepare yourself. Speak with people who have already reached the same realization you'd like to see happen for yourself by end 2011. If you don't know anybody directly, look online, browse some videos and personal testimonies. For myself, I'm planning on going totally rogue with my physical appearance. And I'm doing exactly the above. It helps with mental preparation, self-motivation and determination.
• .Elaborate your execution plan. Step 1, 2, 3...each one with the expected end result, some type of progression sheet.
• Last but not least, cook all that in prayer. There's no better supporter or cheerleader than God. He'll guide you in distinguishing what's good, agreeable and perfect for you. By trusting Him, with all your heart and leaning not on your own understanding, acknowledging Him in all your ways, He will make your paths straight*. After all, you don't know what may happen along the way, good or bad, you can be certain He'll be able to hold your hands through it all.

*Proverbs 3:5-6

Stay Tuned, Stay Blessed, Stay Prepared for 2011.
Tresor De Beaute


Those who were successful around us were not aliens. Whatever their endurance, there were like us. The difference is that in the place of fear, they had a different feeling, their trust in God. Rev R.W.

How to Right Your Wrong: Why David Was Still a Man After God's Heart After His Double Criminal Act

     I often hear Christians [and by Christians I mean Children of God in Christ Jesus] say "The blood of Jesus covers all this (and by "this", they mean, their "unchristian" way of living) even God still considered David the man after his own heart after his adultery coupled with murder."
     For the people who are not familiar with the story, David was the king of Israel who fell in adultery with another man's wife, got her pregnant, then plotted to get her husband killed at war to marry her. Oh Boy, God was  DISGUSTED, He was sooo PISSED, he decided to take away his son's life (progeny from David's adulterous relationship). But yet, when referring to David, He still called him "The man's after his own heart."
     It's no secret what David did to deserve such an honor, he did the one thing that eludes so many Christians nowadays: Repentance. He promptly repented as soon as his fault was pointed to him. He repented in front of Nathan the Prophet, he repented to his wife Bathsheba [Although, the bible does say that specifically, one has to believe that it happened as there's nothing as painful for a mother as to lose her own child. And David knew it was his fault the LORD struck their son*.] and I can bet that if Uriah was still alive, he would have begged for his forgiveness as well. Do Christian believers still behave like that today? Most of us believe that "dealing with God" alone is enough...Well it is but if and only your sin affects you and only you. When other people are involved, we must take the extra biblical step that consists into leaving our offering at the altar, going and being reconciled to our brother or sister**. As good and loving and forgiving our God is, He is Righteous and one can not pretend to love God and reject his righteousness. God was so unpleased with David's behavior that he didn't even recognize or approve of his marriage to Bathsheba [still referring to her as "Uriah's wife"***] until after he had repented, nine verses down***** "Then David comforted his wife Bathsheba, and he went to her and lay with her. She gave birth to a son, and they named him Solomon. The LORD loved him."
     One of my favorite preachers always says that "God never gave the Law for us to follow it rather to expose our shortcomings." that's why it was necessary for Christ to die for us to reconcile us to God our Father. David recognized his iniquity, confessed, and turned away from it. God punished his sin, but loved him more and restored him.
     We're all bound to go astray from God, whether is by getting involved with the wrong people, or by slandering a fellow brother/sister, or by just ignoring the good we're supposed to do. The question is: what do we do when we realize we did wrong? Do we justify our ways or do we take a page out of David's book?

* (2Sam12:15)
** [Matt5:23]
*** (2Sam12:15)] 
***** (2Sam12:24)

Stay Tuned, Stay Blessed, Stay Repentant
Tresor De Beaute

Stuffs I Read on Twitter This Week

If you fail in your life, it will be because of a person you chose to dishonor. If you succeed it will be because of a person you decided to honor.


Affection is not Proof of Trustworthiness. Affection Is A Reaction...Or A Diversion.

My Clock...Does Not Assess My Progress. My Completions...Assess My Progress

Friends of friends are not always friends

What Are The REWARDS of A Friendship With YOU? ..Listener? ..Encourager? ..Confidentiality? ..Energy?

   

Your Future Is Approaching at The Speed Of Your Decisions. 

You Don't Really Know Someone...Until You: ..Hire Them ..Fire Them ..Marry Them ..Tell Them "No."

 
Whatever people think of you will never change your destiny. However what you think of other people may change it.-- R.W.

Uncover Your Financial Woes

     It's known that divorce or death of a partner have brought financial cataclysm for the abandoned party especially when the latter is a woman.

     I read this story a long time ago about a woman who after her husband's funeral, discovered that he had racked up debt to his neck and was leaving her and the kids in charge of paying them off. He had depleted their retirement savings in an unsuccessful attempt to pay off his dues.
     This one is about a woman who asked her spouse how much school loans he had accumulated and he replied "about 10k", nevertheless at the next mail delivery, she checked the one that came from the loan institution just to found out that the loan was just a couple of bricks short of 40k.
     Another one is about this man who decided to defer his federal income tax withholdings saying he'd rather save it on his own before repaying during tax season. At his wife insistence, they filed jointly to save on taxes. And of course they had to take a hit because of the husband's delinquency on back taxes.

     All these stories illustrated one concept: Love does not exempt control. A couple must establish a system of checks and balances that equilibrates the financial dynamism of their partnership. Although one spouse may have amazing financial skills, the other should definitely keep a copy and have an understanding of the household income statement and balance sheet. The income statement will give you summary of revenues, such as your salary plus any other source of revenues, and expenses of your household such as bills paid, shopping, entertainment or miscellaneous expenses...etc and will tell you if you're saving or living above your means. Whereas the balance sheet would show you at a point in time all your assets (e.g. house, investments, 401k...etc), debts (mortgages, loans, credit cards...etc) and Equity (e.g. home equity) you may have. In software engineering, even the most canny developer has his code tested by a quality team. The best writer has his posts, articles or books proofread to detect any type of errors. Even the best companies in their domains have a quality control team, why shouldn't a couple apply the same principles to their finances, this very domain of their lives that affect them?
     This concept has been around for ages even before Christ's birth, and has been recorded by the wisest man: King Solomon. King Solomon has been attributed authorship of the book of Proverbs (my favorite) in the Bible. The last chapter is often titled "The Virtuous Woman" and it talks about the qualities such a woman has:
     - "Her husband has full confidence in her". Trust is a two way street. You can't break someone trust and still expect them to trust. A couple must be able to trust each other with their finances according to the guidelines they have set for themselves.
     - "out of her earnings she plants a vineyard". A woman must have earning, income, revenue.
     - "She sees that her trading is profitable". Here's that word again, PROFIT or SAVINGS. I talked earlier about the income statement which is the financial statement that shows profit or loss. In order to determine that her trading is profitable, a woman must understand and keep track of her household entries and outings/expenditures.
     - "Her children arise and call her blessed"--I just don't buy in the theory of "Stay-at-home" mom, according to which a woman makes a choice to stay home to "take care" of her kids. This is definitely a whole new topic that I'll have to discuss later. However, I would like to add this, staying-at-home is the straight and surest road to depression. Just read the stories and see for yourself.
     There are many more rules and precepts that can be extracted from Proverbs thirty one and none of them
exempt the man from his responsibilities as a husband. I just wanted to keep the focus on women as they're the ones always suffering financially after the divorce or the death of their spouse. The above concept are just preventable measures to empower mostly married women.
     Love does not and should NOT exempt control. As finances and adultery are running amok among the top reasons for divorce, it is very important for couples to be transparent with their finances with one another, and to find a common platform that would allow them to keep healthy books while not suffocating or feeling suffocated by their spouse.


Stay tuned, Stay bold, Prevent yourself from financial woes
Tresor De beaute


Whatever people think of you will never change your destiny. However what you think of other people may change it.-- R.W.

Got bad debt? Write it off !!

     Bernie Madoff proved us that crooks are not just the ones  with a mask on their heads and a gun on their hands. They're not just the ones I used to see in Cameroon at Mokolo market, naked and harshly flagellated resultant of popular justice. Like Madoff, they can dress well, smell good, greet us during meeting, be polite and they can also be our Exs. They're basically any people that owes you money, know very well they owe you the money but yet refuse to pay you back.
     Once upon a time I had a Madoff, he refused to pay me back and then justified his behavior by saying he had offered a coat and a back pack to a relative of mine and some other things. While men boast about buying luxurious cars and house to their wives or significant others, he was boasting about a raincoat and a bag which together were worth less than a hundred bucks. Another one, someone else's Madoff, just didn't bother to acquit himself from his debt. Readers, anytime a Man (man and woman alike) prides himself of his amoral deeds, know that there's more to hope from a dead cat than him. For all your Madoff(es), write them off as bad debt.
     Investopedia defines a bad debt as one that is not collectible and therefore worthless to the creditor. Bad debt is usually a product of the debtor going into bankruptcy. Therefore, declare your Madoff(es) rationally  bankrupt and intellectually corrupt, then "forgive the bastard and move on" wrote a mother warrior or as P.A. Hamilton often says "Let bygones be bygones" and let them battle with their own conscience if they still have one alive. After all your peace is PRICELESS.

Stay Tuned, Stay Bold, Say Goodbye n Good Luck to your Madoff(es)

Whatever people think of you will never change your destiny. 

However what you think of other people may change it.-- R.W.

Always Remind Me

Always remind me of your mercy on me
So I may show the same mercy unto others
Always remind me of where I had fallen
So I may not think I'm better than others
Always remind me of your goodness towards me
So I may show the same goodness towards others
Always remind me of what you have suffered because of me
So I may remember that life at times is unfair
Always remind me of the dirt I used to be
So I may keep the purity I now am
Always remind me of the gift you have given me
So I may also share it with others
Always remind me of my weaknesses and vulnerabilities
So I may always rely on your strength and invulnerabilities
Always remind of how beaten I was
So I may recall of the rewards of life based on unrighteousness and lies
Always remind me of your righteousness and truth
So I may always remember there's nothing better than to have you hover me


 Stay Tuned, Stay Bold, Stay Beautiful
Tresor De Beaute

The good I tried to do Was thrown back in my face
The hurt and the pain brought tears to my eyes
But God has replaced a blessing For every tear that I've cried

The Gift of Repentance

     Scandals in church are as old as time: brothers killing their own brothers (Cain and Abel), kids sleeping with their dad's wife for all to see (Absolom), king sending hoi polloi to war to be killed and get their wives (King David), fellas slandering one another, the list goes on. They are still happening today, divorces, who slept with who, drugs abuse, abortion, homosexuality, pedophilia and more. And all of us at one point in time or for a time period, have stood on either side of the fence as a victim or as a perpetrator. To the victim I say, pray til your soul is totally restored, to the perpetrator I'd say, pray til the gift of repentance is given to you and your soul is totally restored. And this brings me to what  I would like to talk about: The Gift of Repentance.

     The fact remains that none of us is perfect, we all have our little shenanigans: lies (white or black), bad thoughts, porn, unforgiveness, impurity, adultery, slander, self-righteousness..., thus we're condemned to hurt one another one way or the other regardless of how much we may love one another. Fortunately we all possess the ability to say: "I'm sorry" or "Forgive me" and that's called repentance. Now, what I call the Gift of Repentance is not only to say "I'm sorry" and to truly mean it but to also go one step further and renounce our ways!! Was this the case, so many partnerships, friendships, camaraderies would be healed and get stronger.
     Unfortunately, our tendency as Christian perpetrators is to do bad and to confess to God, then do bad again then confess to God. Well this works if and only if your badness is only affecting you and you alone. In the case where more than one person are involved, we must ask for forgiveness not only to God but also to all the parties involved AND renounce our ways. Sadly, we treat our badness like cocaine, we inhale it and its magic works on us. Then we tried to stop using it but we can't, we try harder but we still can't. We're hooked, we're trapped, we're addicted.
     Henceforth, we need God's grace to intervene in our favor. There are many of us who take resolution "I will no longer do this"..."This is the last time" but who for some reasons can't help themselves. To them I say please persevere for the God of the Bible will let himself found by you if you truly seek him with all your heart. We Christians have altered the word of God by saying "We won't watch, we won't pray and we won't fall into temptation" says H.W. Resenting what God says doesn't make it less true nor does misinterpreting it to our own advantage. If we don't watch and don't pray, we will fall into temptation, square and fair.

     When I started my program of  "Starting Over Start From Scratch", in prayer and lamentations (sometimes you have to get them tears out), I resolved to ask for forgiveness from all I knew I had purposefully offended with no harm incurred from them. To get there, I had to do some soul searching, wondering about the height from which I had fallen. Then, I had to repent and start doing the things I did at first. Sometimes, to resume doing the things we did at first, requires a change of scenery, a change of garments or even a change of friends. It requires a total disassociation with things of the past, anything that or anyone who has partaken to our downfall, otherwise history is condemned to repeat itself.
     Repentance is a gift from above to the repentant. To repent does not merely mean to plead guilty to all charges, but also to renounce our ways. The latter may take more than one try, or two or even three, whatever the number may be, let's just not give up.

Stay Tuned, Stay Bod, Stay Repentant
Tresor De Beaute